Original Publication Information:
Suedomsa the Magazine December 1997 Volume One,
Issue
Five
Introduction by Mike Malloy
Passion, Lemons, and a little Stress
While I would love to introduce the winter issue of Suedomsa with holiday
greetings and good tidings, in all fairness, I cannot. I must share an
interesting thought that life has shown me.
The old saying goes, "If life gives you lemons, make lemonade." I don't
exactly agree with the wisdom contained in that simple and somewhat
overused phrase. I like the philosophy of Henry Rollins of the Rollins
Band. In his collection of stories, The Spoken Word, Henry tells
us that if life gives us lemons we should respond promptly with, "Oh yeah,
I like lemons, what else ya' got?"
With trying times on the way (or perhaps they're already here for you),
I'm sure that there will be enough lemons so that each of us might drink a
glass of its bitter juice. I say take a glass. Then, like Rollins, ask
what else "they" have. Conquer those finals, pursue beautiful women,
handosme men (or both if you so choose), destroy the outstanding debts
that you have, and tell that annoying boss that you've had enough of their
shit. Create a beverage of stress, financial difficulties and a little
passion. I'm sure that blended with some ice, all the problems will go
down a little easier.
On the bright side of matters, the holidays are a time for rejoicing and
celebrating with friends. Why not celebrate the victories (or juices)
that you've fought for (squeezed) in this season of spending, studying and
stress. Just past the turkey, past the menorah, and past the annoying
relatives that won't stop pinching your cheeks (for some, I'm sorry to
say, that means both sets of cheeks), I can see the light...
...1998!
Tabitha's Men by Tabitha
Wharton
I have a comment on life that I want to share. I've had an interesting
November, and I hope that December turns out to be half as interesting.
I've gone places, met wonderful people, met not-so-wonderful people, been
loved, been hurt, searched myself, and found a lot of things that I'd
forgotten were there. And I want to be able to invite everyone into this
place that I've discovered.
I often wonder why I am here, and why I have to put up with all the bad
things in life. I have not been faithful to myself the last few weeks,
and I was very upset about it. The meaning of life has been clear to me
for a while now, and yet sometimes I still forget that I know what it's
all about, and let myself get bogged down in a swamp of emotional
confusion.
I spent some time in Denver with people I had never met before in my life.
It was interesting to see what kind of connections and relationships
developed between eight people who knew a lot about each other but had
never interacted physically. I found some kindred spirits, fell in love,
fell out of love, cried, laughed, and had a lot of fun. These are the
things that make us who we are.
Some of these people that I met this weekend were great kindred spirits,
and they made use of a term I'd never understood before, although I've
seen them use it. Now I think it might be the epitome of everything I've
been working for my whole life. This word is foo. Foo-ness is a state of
being where you love everyone, even the people you hate, and you value
love above everything. Being foo means that it's ok to kiss people, to hug
people, to snuggle with people, and to love people, and you don't have to
have sex with them, be their girlfriend or anything like that. You can if
you want, but it's all about love, and the connection you feel when you
love someone. I want my everyday life to be like this.
I want everyone to get emotionally involved in life and not be afraid to
feel. I want to be able to hold hands with my best girlfriend and kiss her
on the lips without people making assumptions about either of us. Love
isn't about sex, but sex should be about love. You should be able to tell
anyone that you love them without them thinking that you want anything
from them. Life is love is life is love is life...
One of these kindred spirits, one of my foos, told me today that when the
other kindred spirit, who is her boyfriend, comes to stay with me in a
month and a half, if anything happens between us, because we love each
other, that she doesn't want me to feel guilty. She believes love is
about sharing, and about loving, and experiencing love on any level that
you can find is the best thing possible in life. Wow. I find this very
profound, and I realized that I've always believed the same thing, only I
have never met anyone else who felt that way. And I love her all that
much more because of it.
So if I ever tell you that I love you, don't take it too hard, it just
means that you're special to me, and I want to let you know that. And if
I kiss you, it's my way of saying, "You're a beautiful person. Thank you
for making my world a bette place." And if, by chance, we ever make love,
always remember it as something wonderful that we that we did to share our
love of life, and each other, and everything else in the world.
